


misprint

by yourloveisameme



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Ficlet, M/M, Not Harry Potter and the Cursed Child Compliant, hahahaha, play?? what play???????
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-29
Updated: 2016-09-29
Packaged: 2018-08-18 11:38:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8160853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourloveisameme/pseuds/yourloveisameme
Summary: The media doesn't understand the concept of Homosexuals (TM).





	

The tabloids had gotten it wrong. Again. 

“What are they saying this time?” Albus said, pouring milk into his coffee as he sat at the breakfast table. 

Scorpius held up the cover. “'Scorpius’s Shocking Secret',” he read aloud. “' _Is the Malfoy heir hiding a secret passion for Rose Weasley, the daughter of his family’s mortal enemies?_ '”

“What?” said Albus, nearly knocking over his coffee. “They think you and _Rose_...?”

“There’s a picture, see.” It was a photo of their trio walking down the road, headed to go eat at one of the nearby Muggle shops. The autumn breeze was ruffling their hair and they leaned against each other as they walked close together against the cold. (How had they gotten this picture anyway? Were there paparazzi stalking them at every turn? It was a worrying thought.) 

“But...we’re literally holding hands in this picture!” 

“I know.” He flipped open to the page with the article. “ _Scorpius Malfoy was spotted in London in the company of Albus Severus Potter, his roommate--_ ”

“Roommate? Seriously?”

“... _and Rose Weasley, the red-haired, irresistible beauty_ \--ha, wait till we tell Rose that-- _who has captured the hearts of countless male wizards across the country_...blah blah...” 

“Too bad she doesn’t like men.”

Scorpius grinned. He put down the paper and reached for a biscuit, then reached across the table to steal the coffee from Albus, as he was always too lazy to make his own. 

“Ridiculous,” Albus said, shaking his head as he threw the tabloid into the bin. “ _Roommate_ , honestly...”

“I mean, technically, you are,” Scorpius pointed out. 

“Most people don’t shag their roommates or go on dates with them.”

“Yeah,” Scorpius said, smiling in that way that still gave Albus's heart a tiny flutter. “I like this arrangement, though.”

^

“' _Elaborate bonding ceremony_?'” Albus exclaimed, looking at the paper. “Are they serious?” 

“Wait, what?” Scorpius sat up straight in their honeymoon bed, pushing aside the expensive silken sheets. 

“ _Saturday evening Albus Severus Potter and Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy_ \--they even spelled your name wrong, look--”

“Told you we should have changed our names,” said Scorpius, absentmindedly reaching out to run his fingers through his husband’s dark, coarse hair.

“-- _participated in a ritual bonding ceremony to commemorate their friendship_...It was literally a wedding, ask any of those three hundred guests...”

“But literally we did the same things hetero couples do..?” Scorpius looked down at their hands, with their matching silver rings, studded with emeralds. Slytherin colors. (Yeah, yeah, it was cheesy, he knew.)

“ _This ritual, two wizards pledging loyalty to each other through the Unbreakable Vow, has a long history, in the tradition of  Gryffindor and Slytherin, Aleister Crowley and Victor Neuberg_...I--I can't even deal with this.” He let the paper flutter out of his hands onto the floor.

“It’s funny,” Scorpius scooted closer to him, and he put an arm around his waist. “Because those are the two gayest historical couples ever.” He blinked at him, blue-gray eyes twinkling, through his long blonde eyelashes. 

“Straight people,” Albus said with a heavy sigh, sinking back into the huge pillows, white and fluffy, like clouds. He pressed himself closer to his husband’s warmth, feeling their bare skin touch. “They never learn.”

  
(fin.)


End file.
